Feel
by ChaoticChris
Summary: Post ToS—Many years after Aselia had been united, Genis Sage, no longer a child, stands on the shores of Altamira with a single question on his mind. "Why am I here?" Implied mystery Genisx? pairing.


Hello, Symphonia Fanfictioners. To any old readers of mine, as everyone expected, it's been a month or two since I last posted anything. For that, I am to blame. Been getting ready for college this summer and bought a new laptop, a Mac. Having to transfer the Word files from my PC to said Mac has been a physical writer's block for me. So trying to write without my drafts and outlines at hand on this laptop has doused my fire to write. Feeling bad that I haven't uploaded in a while, I decided to dust off some old files and post it. This is that file.

This oneshot is actually almost 3 years old. So don't judge my writing too harshly now. Initially it was suppose to be—what I like to refer as—a "tri-shot" (a story with three parts/chapters). But, as you can see, I am unable to continue the other two parts. Sorry.

Before you dive in, I know I never say these things, but I'd like to recommend to you an instrumental song to listen to as you read. It's Thomas Bergersen's "Remember Me" and I hope it enhances the tone I'm trying to convey. I listened to it and it inspired me to share that experience as I self-betad this chapter.

Song Link (be sure to insert the dot com correctly): youtube(insert ".com" here)/watch?v=YwMDL4tU-FE&feature=relmfu

Thank you, and enjoy!

**Disclaimer:** Namco Bandai owns the rights to Tales of Symphonia. I am just a fan.

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_**Feel**_

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I could _feel_ it. The sea breeze gently danced on by, swirling its willowing embrace around me before returning back to ride the waves of the ocean. Its gusts of wind tickled my cheeks and rustled my unruly silver locks. The shining sun, unguarded by the fluffy marshmallow-white clouds of the sky, outstretched its rays, showering them down above me. The heat of the sun was scorching, heating up my body to flush a mild crimson and causing speckles of sweat to condensate on my forehead. To ease the burning sensation, the ocean water's mist sprayed my face, mixing with my own sweat and cooling my body down. The sediment of salt in the mist filled my nose with the aroma of the sea, and as I trudged on, the lukewarm sand that had been sitting out in the sunlight seeped into my boots, filling them with pieces of beach. With every step I took, the grains of sand shifted deeper, maneuvering inside my socks and settling in-between my toes, heating them up as well.

I could _hear_ it. The sound of people relaxing, having fun, and enjoying the day echoed into the deep-blue skies and radiated into my ears. The many tapping footsteps of tourists clamored as they shuffled throughout the cobblestone marketplace. The squishing sound of sand as children and young adults jogged across the shore. And near them were the crystal, sapphire sea waves, its caps crashing onto the shoreline and emitting a swooshing noise. The crowd's many voices boomed into the sky, their speech slurring in concert to form an incomprehensible human voice. Above their heads were seagulls, crying out their ever notable _Caws! _as they glided on the sea breeze. All the sounds synched together as if initiating a unison attack, and they continued to pound my eardrums with the sound of the city.

And the best thing about the city is that I could _see_ it. I could see everything I felt, see everything I heard, giving me complete appreciation and understanding of our world. The city of Altamira was truly the city of paradise. And the more and more I returned to this tourist spot, the more I felt blissful, without a care in the world. There was just something magical about everything in this town that led me to believe that peace could be found in anything you see, anything you hear, anything you can feel. Maybe that's why I always came back to live in—if only for a brief moment—a place of complete serenity. To be in place where I could believe that discrimination didn't exist is all I would need for me to finally achieve the peace within me. However, I know for a fact that it would be ridiculous, stupid even to be deluding myself with such a thought. Inside this city's, Altamira's, walls may hold nothing buy joy, tranquility, and entertainment, but outside those walls lies the same cruel world I know. The one that reveres me, a half-elf, as an abomination. I can't hide from the reality that discrimination exists, or else I would be running away from all that hard work and suffering that others like me went through to make a difference in this world and its people. If I did, I'd just be the same old coward I once was. And I don't want to be like that ever again.

Then, why was I here?

Raine had been busy the previous night, going over several stacks of paperwork and documents that she needed to re-read and sign. She still was a diligent worker even now after the World Reunification. As a teacher before the worlds were one, I saw Raine spending many of her nights devoted to her students of Iselia. She checked over all our class' worksheets and homework, graded quizzes and tests, wrote the agenda and lessons of the next day in advance, and sometimes stayed late at night at the little wooden schoolhouse to tutor her students that required further teaching. And she wouldn't stop until all her work had been completed. Even now at present day, Raine kept that same regime, working far into the morning that by the time I had awoken from my sleep she was passed out from exhaustion at her worktable. The work was too intensive for her to continue and I couldn't blame her. Though deep down inside, I felt that she would blame herself when she eventually woke up. Not getting her things finished and on time was never Raine's style. We both are working for the same thing, to end discrimination, and so I can see why she would deeply resent unfinished business towards such an important cause. However, I believe Raine would hate something much more than herself when she wakes up.

Me.

Since I had woke up earlier than her, I took the opportunity to sneak out of bed. Without waking her from her slumber, of course, I clothed myself in my usual outfit of azure and elven swirls, and prepared a quick breakfast of blueberry pancakes, my best breakfast dish and one of Raine's favorites, shortly after. Upon finishing the dish, I gobbled up one of the pancakes quickly and sat the rest on a platter, placing them ever so close in front of Raine on her desk so she would see it when she first opened her eyes. That would ease her anger somewhat at least to wake up to soft pancake goodness. With my guilt of abandoning Raine alone with paperwork lessened, I chanced gathering my boots and quickly headed out the door that morning before the guilt returned, unknowing of where my feet would take me. But now, even as I stand on the very sandy shores of Altamira, I still question myself for taking the initiative on coming here.

Just why did my subconscious bring me here to Altamira of all places, using the emergency rhieard no less?

My feet carried me, wandering off the beaches of the paradise city to somewhere else while I continued to wrap my head around the question of why I was here. I traversed around carelessly and mindlessly up the stone stairs back to the cobblestone streets. And I continued to stroll about, even to the point of meandering off to the gates to the tram-car. Stepping onto the transport, I waited as the doors of the entrance shut and the attendee operated the machine, turning on the tram and jerking it forward to its destination. The question still lingered in my mind as I watched the splashing white waves crash into the tram-car and the town behind me gradually shrink. Before I knew it, the town was gone and to replace it was a dark tunnel. And when we emerged at the other end, we entered a lit room. The car screeched to a halt and the gates re-opened upon our arrival.

Once I reached the destination, I heard the attendee say something, possibly thanking me for using their services and to enjoy Altamira like they always do. But I had not listened; I was too caught up to do so. Instead, I walked off the tram-car and examined each nook and cranny of the lobby. Judging from the absence of carnival rides, I was clearly not at Altamira's amusement park. I sighed at realizing this and watched as the attendee left on his tram, returning to the city. Apparently I failed to hear that the park was yet to be opened either. Despite that, I ambled on to the half-circular information desk, finding that as long as I was here that I might as well do something productive until the park did open.

The female assistant at the desk noticed my approaching presence and politely asked, "What is it that you need this early in the morning, good sir?"

Another good question, yet I didn't know how to answer… Or so I thought until something overcame me and erupted out of mouth, "I'd like to speak with Mr. Bryant."

"Master Bryant?" the woman repeated, a clandestine hint of wonder and spite in her voice. It was as if she questioned my connection with a high classed noble like Regal Bryant. But I understood that through her eyes she probably saw me as some low, scraggly half-elf. Her gaze looked me over momentarily and then jumped to a small velvet book, most likely Regal's schedule of the day. Skimming through the pages, she arrogantly told me, "I'm sorry, sir, but Master Bryant is out today. He left early dawn to go to a meeting. If you'd like, I could book you for an appointment with him two months from today." The pages stopped flipping, and her gaze was pinned back on me.

"Oh, that's alright. I'll just come back another day. Thank you though," I said with a puny, half-done smile. I don't know why, but hearing that I couldn't see Regal made me feel downhearted. And it worsened as I turned to leave, knowing that when I went back to Raine that I would have no true excuse as to why I left her all alone to fend for herself with all the paperwork.

However, the chime of one of the elevators signaled my hope. And a familiar, low voice rang into my ears right after, "Master Genius Sage?"

Turning back around, I spotted none other than George, Regal's assistant, pop out of the elevator. He approached me and extended a hand, which I gladly shook. Just to even see a familiar face lightened my spirits. With a brighter smile, I greeted George, "Nice to see you, George! It's been a while since I've visited, hasn't it?"

After the handshake, the old gray-haired man replied, "It surely has. We've been missing both you and your sister's presence, especially Master Bryant. You know, I barely recognized you, Master Genius, since you've grown so much over the past years. You even have a stubble surrounding your face." He pointed it out by rubbing his own chin.

Eavesdropping on our conversation nearby was the female at the information desk that I had spoken to prior. She immediately shouted out in surprise, "Y-you mean _the _Genis Sage? Like one of the Heroes of World Regeneration?" Her once scrutinizing eyes had softened, warmed up by the shocking news. "I never knew he had a beard!" Well, now I could completely understand why she saw me as scraggly in the first place.

I chuckled lightly to myself, rubbing my own chin to confirm that I had forgotten to shave away my five o'clock shadow on my face. And sure enough, the rough slivers of hair were poking my hand. "I guess I should have considered to shave before leaving so early this morning."

"Ah, what am I thinking," George told himself as he shook his head side to side. Looking at me, he said, "Surely you are not here to be speaking to someone like me. You must be here for Master Bryant."

I was honest and nodded.

George informed me, "I'm sorry to say that you just missed him a half-hour ago. He left for a conference with the king in Meltokio—something about a new building project in Ozette I believe. But he should return in two weeks' time if you wish to speak with him."

"Oh, I see," I responded, nodding once more.

He then continued solemnly, "I hate to be so abrupt, especially after just running into you after so long; however, I do have errands that I must fulfill in Master Bryant's absence. If there is anything more that you need, please do tell me before I leave."

Using my hand, I rubbed the back of my neck. "Nothing re—" My gaze drifted off behind George's figure. With my sapphire eyes, I saw the empty elevator, inviting me to take a ride. "A-actually, is the rooftop of the Lezareno Company closed-off?"

"It is," the kind assistant said. "Master Bryant wishes that the public isn't to be on the rooftop to prevent any damages on the grounds in any way."

Downhearted again, I sunk my head, "O-oh…" A faint frown crept onto my face.

"… But seeing is that you have such close ties with Master Bryant, I believe that he would wish that you would have personal access to the rooftop any time you'd like."

Shooting up my head, I exclaimed, almost joyful, "R-really?"

George only gave me a brief, tiny smile before putting a key card into my hands. "It's the spare, so no one should question it, although just be sure not to lose it for I believe it might cost me."

"George… thanks." I appreciatively beamed.

Then, like he said, the old man walked off, going on his way to do his errands. I heard him call out as he departed on the tram, "Hope to see you soon, Master Sage."

Seeing him gone, I grasped the key card tightly in my hands and walked into the elevator with a newfound purpose. In doing so though, I heard the female and her desk-workers conversing amongst each other when I passed by.

"I spoke to him, _the_ Genis Sage! Can you believe it?" the female assistant chirped.

"That can't be him… can it?" another whispered in disbelief.

"It is him! Just watch…" The trio at the information desk all sent their attention towards me. And then the female assistant cried out with pursed cheeks that formed a cutesy smile, "Have a good day, Master Genis—I mean, Master Sage!"

Being a gentleman, I took the time to wave at the desk-workers and flash an awkward smile their way before taking the key card George gave me and swiped it across the vertical slot next to the buttons. Noticing that the rooftop button had lit up, I pressed it and thankfully the doors began to shut. Once they closed completely, I instantly let my back lean against the wall and exhaled, glad that I didn't have to deal with the pressure of communicating with that snobbish assistant any longer. Associating with people that only acknowledge me for my fame is, in my opinion, rude and insulting. I just can't stand people like that… which started to make me wonder if Zelos thought that way at all about his hunnies.

Next thing I knew, a high pitch chime indicated that I reached the highest level and the sliding gate opened up, allowing me to step out and see the sights. There before me was a tranquil garden fit with dark, luscious green grass and tropical arrays of flowers and plants. Beige stone columns lined the three different pathways into the centerpiece of the entire garden, which was a prominent headstone decorated with inscribed letters and glyphs. Behind it was a mini waterfall that allowed water to cascade throughout the entire garden. Slowly, I strolled over to the headstone, eyes staring it down in admiration.

I may have not understood why I subconsciously came here to Altamira, but now I have a hunch why.

Breathing deeply through my nose, I prepared myself to talk. "H-hi…" I meekly began, voice wavering slightly, "I-I know I am not the rightful person to be here, speaking with you, but I feel the urge to talk to someone, anyone to ease myself of this… loneliness."

I paused, awaiting to hear someone tell me to go away and that I'm not welcome on such holy grounds. Hearing nothing but the sea breeze whistling through my ears, coaxing me on, I continued, "It's been years since I've talked with someone casually. I mean, conversing with Raine is enjoyable and all, but lately it's been nothing but nonstop strict business with our journey of ending discrimination." I sighed, my lips breaking out into a smile. "Although, I can bet that you can understand that with your past with your own sister after all."

Again, the wind brushed past my ears, whistling in a rhythmic beat. It was as if it was chuckling along with me and agreeing.

"Everyone's gone their separate ways ever since the Journey of World Regeneration, and we haven't been together since. Lloyd and Colette have been searching the world of Aselia for any remaining exspheres, and I hear that they've been making great progress. On the other hand, Zelos and Sheena have been creating peace amongst the nations of the old Sylvarant and Tethe'alla. And, well, I'm pretty sure you know how things have been for both Altamira and Ozette. For me and my sister, our progress on ending discrimination has been slow, but we are getting somewhere." Pausing, I sighed another time. My sapphire eyes shut, and the people I had mentioned materialized in my mind. Their faces elicited a smile on my face, but, deep down inside, I was torn at the memory. So I opened my eyes. "Man, I truly miss them... They were like family to me." I shook my head, correcting myself. "No… they _are_ my family."

There was silence as the sea breeze swirled all around me, causing my clothing to rustle up and my strands of hair to float... It felt comforting.

"Speaking of family…" The wind died down, waiting to hear what I had to say. "I heard the kids are doing well. They're about to celebrate their tenth birthday soon, hitting their double digits already. Time really goes by fast, doesn't it?" I questioned aloud, curious.

Gusts of wind moved up and down, bringing flower petals for the ride. It was if it was nodding.

"The last time I spoke with Regal you know what he told me? He said to me that the kids have grown up looking like your sister, but I digress!" I cockily proclaimed, winking with a happy smile.

The breeze roared in off beat tempos like it was laughing. Listening to the wind, I laughed along as well.

"I-I haven't loosened up like this in forever," I admitted aloud, childishly smiling. "… And I think I found out why, and also the reason why I decided to come to Altamira in the first place."

The sea breeze was so silent to the point I could only hear my own breathing.

My attention falling on the headstone, I deeply breathed one last time and spoke every feeling that I had lingering in my heart. "Truth is I've been feeling distant for the past few years, ever since I failed to keep my promises of protecting the ones I love and always being there for them… But now, I know after speaking with you again that without a doubt you are able to fulfill our promise, our promise of always being there for each other. I may not be able to be there for you anymore… but you can. Even if I can't see you or hear you, you'll always be there by my side because of the best part… I'll always be able to feel your presence around me, right?"

The gentle sea breeze collided into my torso at full force, pushing me and causing me to stumble back a few steps back. The caressing wind engulfed me all around my chest, holding me tight like a hug. And I could've been imagining it, but I swore I heard a faint 'yes' hanging in the wind. Either way, I closed my eyes and smiled bigger and brighter than I ever had.

"… Thank you, Presea. And say hello to Alicia for me."

Before me, engraved on the garden's new headstone were fine glistening, golden letters: _This garden in memory of Alicia Combatir & Presea Combatir. May you both forever remain in our hearts as you rest in peace._

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**Author's Note**

I know this oneshot isn't like any of my upbeat or comedic stories, but, at the time I wrote this, I felt like writing something introspective and melancholy. To be honest, I wrote this oneshot after the death of my grandfather back when I was still in high school. And I hope my feelings of that time could be felt through Genis' eyes. Hence, the big theme of the senses, primarily feel.

The reason why I am posting it now of all days is because today is his birthday. So to celebrate his life, I wanted to dedicate this oneshot to my grandfather, whom I will always remember and love.

Story Side Comments  
*** **Genis & Presea's relationship: I implied that they had been together. Whether or not they were married or not is all up to you.  
* "The kids" Genis speaks of: I implied them to be the children of Genis and Presea. Regal thinks the kids look like Alicia, while Genis thinks that they look like Presea/himself.  
* Presea's death: I never mention how she dies, but I'd like to think if she ever did pass away early in life, it would be due to her Cruxis crystal. That complications occurred as her body tried to catch up to her actual age.  
* The headstone: I'd like to imagine that since both Combatir sisters were dear to Regal that he would update the headstone to reflect both of them. It does not imply that Presea had been buried there.

I believe I have cleared the air now. Again, thank you for reading. I truly do appreciate it, and I hope that the experience was worth the time. Until next time, have a good one~


End file.
